Who Will Stand Up For Men

When men come out to report an abuse from their spouses or girlfriends, the world find it as a joke. Additionally, most calls for funding proposals never consider issues that affect men. I have come to realise that, for your proposal to be funded, some keywords should be included. Yes, you got it right! The keywords are women, girls, youth, sanitation, circular economy, climate change and persons living with disabilities. In the proposal’s objectives, youth and women rarely miss but no one thinks of men. Probably they do not deserve to be part of the objective because they are “strong.” I am not against women, neither am I against persons living with disabilities, but all that I am saying is that the malechild is usually out of the equation. The big question is why is this so?

Treaties and Statutes

Looking at the different statutes and treaties, such as those that manage natural resources, men tend to be left out. The Dublin principles, for instance, advocate for the inclusion of women in the management of water resources. According to the principles, women play a central part in the provision, management and safeguarding of water resources. One would then wonder whether men are the reason this resource is mismanaged. Such is notable in the United Nations human rights and gender thematic area, where issues are strongly linked to women.

Are Men the Victims

In 2010, the United Nations established UN Women which became the United Nations body dedicated to achieving gender equality. The gender equality in question here is ensuring that women are equal to men, giving an implication that men should stay where they are as women get empowered. There is an SDG goal established to that effect, aimed at ensuring that gender equality is achieved. Gender equality is a good thing, and I believe it was meant to benefit all but as it is, it suppresses one as the other gets empowered. The malechild is the victim here, and no one fights for him, but we are not ready for this discussion. As a young boy, you realize that there are many organizations that advocate for children’s rights but as you grow up it dawns on you that all that was for money.

Have you ever heard of a grant that seeks to fund a proposal on violence against men? Scan through this or any other site and share with us if you get any.

Watch and listen to this video and share your thoughts. Consider the reaction of the lady in the discussion

Gender Based Violence Against Men

Like women, men experience gender-based violence in their homes, yet when it happens the society portrays them as weak. In Kenya, a Member of Prliament was assaulted by his wife, and got mocked about it. Surprisingly, it became a mockery used by male politicians during their campaigns, yet one would expect that they be their brothers protector. The fear of being laughed at prevents the them from opening up during man talks. National Coalition against gender-based violence reports that 1 in every 4 men has experienced some form of physical abuse by an intimate partner. National Institutes of Health further reports that the prevalence of domestic physical violence against men is between 3.4% to 20% in the US. The study further claims that most of these victims had themselves been violent against their partners. In essence, this is like justifying the abuse against them.

Search for “Gender-Based Violence Against Men Kenya”

Try and search for the statement above and you will realize that men suffer in silence. The Daily Nation reported 11% of men have experienced some form of violence from their partners, with 9% and 4% experiencing physical and sexual abuse respectively. These values could be high because we never report when we undergo these abuses. According to a survey in Kisumu, 76.1% reported intimate partner violence (IPV), with emotional violence accounting for 47.5%. 

Here is a sneak peek of what you get when you search for “Call for proposals for Gender based violenced against men”

Here is another sneak peek of what you get when you search for “prevention of violence against men”

Go through this website and tell us what you noticed.

Myths and Misconceptions About GBV

Gender-based violence happens everywhere and it mentally and physically derails all its victims. Therefore, the world should not condone this societal vice. Here are some myths and misconceptions about gender-based violence.

Gender violence only affects girls

This statement is not true because studies have established that men and boys rarely speak up when they are physically abused or raped. This is because “masculinity” requires that men take it all in. When a man speaks up, the first people that bash him are his fellow men. A few years ago, a clip of YY the comedian talking about how society would laugh if a man came out and said he was abused by his wife. The interviewer, who was a lady, laughed when the interviewee talked about it. It was funny, yeah, but for a fact, it is not funny.

Men are the only perpetrators of GBV

This is a common and widely “accepted” myth that only men can be the perpetrators of domestic violence. It is not true, as there are many cases when women have assaulted men physically. As reported by Arubina, various bodies and policies have so given sufficient grounds to portray women as victims and men as the abusers.

Men are responsible for the majority of known cases of family violence

Further research will prove whether this statement is true or not. However, many reported cases in our media and Anti GBV organizations support this statement. This could be because most men never report assaults or abuse they face. An article published in safespaces acknowledge that male victims of rape are understudied. The article however report that 9.6% of men report sexual victimisation by other men in Kwa Zulu Natal. So, the men are twice the victims here! Why is this so?

Female Perpetrators Only Involve in Domestic Violence as Self-defence

Another prominent myth about male domestic violence is that females and women cannot be perpetrators, and if they are, they must have done it out of self-defense rather than with the purpose to abuse. It is a world-wide myth and one that is gradually acceptable.

No Abuse on Men Because they are Too Strong

It stems from the cultural and societal norms that protray men as dorminant strong beings. It an old myth that has its origin from toxic masculinity. Toxic masculinity is a typical misconception about men that centers on a need to be masculine, strong, dominant, and the head of the family.

Organizations Against Gender-Based Violence

Credit to all organizations trying to make the world a safe place for all by ending GBV. I have sampled a few of them and realized that the focus is on violence against women, children, and recently against the LGBTQ+ community. Saferspaces for instance reports that men commit most acts of interpersonal gender-based violence against women. The organization lists the following types of gender-based violence. What do you notice?

• Violence against women and girls (VAWG)
• Violence against LGBTI people
• Intimate partner violence (IPV)
• Domestic violence (DV)
• Sexual violence (SV)
• Indirect (structural) violence

Here is another video from the Obinha show. Watch it and share your views.