The Life that Never Is

A very common comment from parents on your first day of school life is, “From the day he came to this world, I knew he was a sharp boy.” They have high hopes and wish the best for their children. The belief that education will take you to places ignorance will never take you to become the centre of every conversation.

Your parents start comparing you with great men, but live not to meet their expectations. But have you sat down and thought of how bogus and unpredictable life is? The beautiful names that you give your children, with some nice meanings, hoping that they will live up to the name?

Am I Really Inconsequential?

I like what Chase Lean says in his article “The Life That Never Was.” He says that it’s easy to think how inconsequential one is. He wonders if some people look up to you, wondering how you go about your daily life. We had dreams of living better lives, taking care of our ageing parents, and giving our children the best. Dreams to support our siblings, and the less fortunate in society. We had dreams, to support charity works and ensure a society that is fit for us all. But then the reality dawned on us.

I Just Want to Be Rich

In my final year in college, my lecturer asked us what each one of us wanted. As expected from 24-year-olds, everyone wanted a good job and a happy family, but I was of a different opinion. I only wanted to be rich. I did not care about the job or anything, as long as I became rich. We got out of college, but contrary to our expectations, the jobs never came, and neither did the richness. Not once nor twice did we lose hope in life, but every day as the sun rose and set, our hopes diminished.

Short Life in the Village

As I awaited my graduation, I stayed in the village, in what most of us term as “rejuvenation.” It is always the case after college because you need to re-energise before you hit the road again. Because of the cold weather, harvest time usually happens in November and December. We went for harvesting and a feud spewed between me and a guy who had no college education. At that point, it hit me hard that I dreamt of a life that never is, and probably will never be. From the heated discussion, he made it clear to me that I was no different from him. I was a graduate, but he wasn’t. Was he right? I guess so.

He Was Right

For a moment, I thought he was very right. Looking at my life, the big life that I always dreamt of was not being manifested. Engulfed in deep thoughts, it dawned on me that I was the first in my village to join a university. I remembered how every person in our village used me as an example whenever there was an event. I got several invitations to talk to young men about the importance of education, and how it assured us of a bright future. But I am jobless, yet I spent four years at the university. From his outlook, he was doing better and was one of the village champions. So I convinced myself that he was right.

Life with Shattered Dreams

The dreams of a very good life shaped by my good grades are now shattered. Though some dreams were weird, they painted a picture of the good life that we foresaw. I recall a time when we were ploughing with a friend deemed a brother. Then we envisaged how we will have a joint colorful wedding, that embodies true love. We talked about how we would be the CEOs of multinational organisations, and how our our innovations would spur change.

A lady friend once joked that if he was the only son, he would never work hard in school. He said this, referring to my friend who was an only son in an able family. Are the dreams still there? Maybe or maybe not, but even if they are there, time is long gone. The dreams are past, and I am living the life as it is now. But what is life? I still can’t define what it is. The one that is, doesn’t fit into the definition I had and can be described by the emoji below.

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Am I A Nobody?

Yeah, I think I am a nobody. I many times try to convince myself that I am still within the realm of achieving my childhood dreams. But the truth is that I have veered off the road. The dreams are shattered, the plans have been replaned again, and the process is effed up. I speak for many comrades who saw a bright future after getting their high school results. Consider the joblessness, and the harsh economic conditions making it difficult to operate a successful business. How about the helpless faces of your dependants looking unto you for help? Are you able to provide a solution to their challenges? Consider the many skills you have learnt in a bid to boost your profile in a competitive world. What about the investments that never saw the light of the day? Are you a nobody?

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